Love & laughter. (Large print book, 2000) [University of Maryland, College Park]

Author:	Lilian Harry
Publisher:	Long Preston : Magna, 2000.
Edition/Format:	book_largeprint : Fiction : English : Large print edView all editions and formats

Details

Genre/Form:	Large type books Domestic fiction Fiction
Material Type:	Fiction
Document Type:	Book
All Authors / Contributors:	Lilian Harry Find more information about:
ISBN:	0750514558 9780750514552
OCLC Number:	59430316
Notes:	Originally published: London: Orion, 1998.
Description:	561 pages ; 23 cm
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WHY DO I SEE LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING????????

by KURSTY (WorldCat user published 2013-08-12) Poor

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WHY DO I SEE LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING????????

"I'VE STARTED DEVELOPING THE SIMPLE-MINDED AND FEEBLE-MINDED MENTALITY THAT LIFE IS NOT WORTH LIVING, THAT THIS WORLD IS NOT MEANT FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME, AND THAT I'M NOT MEANT FOR THIS WORLD EITHER, BECAUSE NOT ONLY DO I FIND THE WORLD A VERY STUPID CRUEL PLACE THAT I DON'T EVEN BELONG IN - I ALSO FIND THE WORLD CONFUSING AND FRIGHTENING! I EVEN FIND MYSELF DREADING EVERY SINGLE DAY THAT COMES BY, BECAUSE ALL I'VE EVER FUCKING DONE IS STRUGGLE CONSTANTLY WITH LIFE AND GO THROUGH SO MUCH SUFFERING, AND ALL I EVER DO IS WONDER HOW MUCH MORE SUFFERING I'LL ONLY END UP ENDURING!!!!!!!!!!!!

"IT'S OKAY FOR ABLE-MINDED PEOPLE TO TELL ME TO STOP DWELLING ON MY CONDITION AND WANTING TO BE RID OF IT, BECAUSE THEY DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT I'M FRUSTRATED BY THE WAY I AM AND THE SITUATION I'M IN!! THEY DON'T SEEM TO UNDERSTAND THAT MY LIFE IS ONE LIVING HELL, BECAUSE I'M UNABLE TO DO ANY OF THE STUFF THAT THEY TAKE FOR GRANTED!! ALL I EVER DO IS GOO THROUGH SO MUCH SUFFERING, AND ALL I EVER DO IS WONDER HOW MUCH MORE SUFFERING I'LL ONLY END UP ENDURING!! THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I GET THAT DEPRESSED WHENEVER LOOKING BACK ON MY LIFE (ESPECIALLY MY TEENS AND TWENTIES) THAT I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE ALIVE ANYMORE, BECAUSE OF ALL THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH AND BECAUSE IT WASN'T WHAT I WANTED!!!!!!!! AND THEN I DREAD REACHING MY THIRTIES BECAUSE I CAN'T BEAR TO THINK WHAT I WILL BE LIKE BY THEN, AND OTHER PEOPLE WILL JUST LABEL ME AS MENTALLY DISABLED AND RETARDED!! EVER SINCE ENTERING ADULTHOOD, I FEEL THAT MY NEEDS HAVE ONLY BECOME MORE, NOT LESS EXTREME, BECAUSE I'VE ONLY BECOME EVEN MORE VULNERABLE AND EVEN MORE DEPENDENT ON OTHERS!!

"MY LIFE IS SAD, FUCKED UP, MISERABLE, AND STUPID COMPARED TO THOSE WHO ARE NOT IN THE SAME BRAIN-DISABLING CONDITION THAT I'M IN BECAUSE THEY HAVEN'T GOT MY DISABILITY!!!! MY EXISTENCE IS A MISERABLE ONE; AND MY WHOLE LIFE SEEMS TO BE GETTING WORSE BIT BY BIT, WHICH IS NOT EVEN MY FAULT BECAUSE I DIDN'T CHOOSE TO BE MENTALLY DISABLED AND DIDN'T CHOOSE THIS SORT OF LIFE - I DIDN'T EVEN WANT TO BE THE WAY I AM! WHEN I SHOULD HAVE BEEN GIVEN A FAIR CHANCE AT LIVING LIFE TO THE FULL JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, I'M LIVING AS SOME MENTALLY DISABLED RETARD AND HAVING TO BE DEPENDING ON OTHER PEOPLE TO HELP ME WITH EVERYTHING - EVEN WHEN IT COMES TO LIVING LIFE!!!!!!! AND I HAVE TO BE TURNING TO PSYCHIATRISTS, THERAPISTS, ETC. ALL I'VE EVER DONE IS CRY OUT FOR HELP - BUT I FEEL THAT NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME OR ABOUT WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH!!!!!!!! NOT EVEN ANY OF THOSE PSYCHIATRISTS AND THERAPISTS CARE ABOUT ME!! EVERYONE ELSE ONLY CARES ABOUT THEMSELVES, AND ARE ONLY OUT FOR THEMSELVES - YET OTHER PEOPLE EXPECT ME NOT TO FEEL DEPRESSED OR HAVE THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE!!

"I CAN'T SEE MYSELF EVER BEING HAPPY; I ONLY SEE MYSELF STRUGGLING EVEN MORE WITH EVERYDAY LIFE THAN I'M ALREADY STRUGGLING WITH EVERYDAY LIFE AT THE MOMENT BECAUSE ONE DAY I'LL ONLY END UP LOOKING BACK AND WISHING THAT THINGS WERE DIFFERENT!!

"I SEE MYSELF AS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO WOULD BE BETTER OFF DEAD. AND I'D RATHER BE AMONG THOSE WHO ARE NOW DEAD THAN HAVE THE SORT OF MESSED UP LIFE THAT I'VE GOT AND HAVE MY LIFE GET ANY WORSE THAN IT ALREADY HAS, BECAUSE ONCE SOMEONE IS DEAD AT LEAST THEY'RE NOT SUFFERING ANYMORE!!

"THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I REGRET BEING BROUGHT INTO THE WORLD!!!!!!!! I HATE MY LIFE THAT MUCH I WISH I HADN'T BEEN BORN AT ALL!!!!!!!!!

BEST ANSWER - CHOSEN BY VOTERS:

MARIA: "KILL YOURSELF AND STOP TAKING UP MY OXYGEN THEN - YOU'RE LIFE IS PERFECT COMPARED TO ALMOST 1.4 BILLION PEOPLE IN THE WORLD THAT LIVE IN EXTREME POVERTY!!!!!!!!

"SERIOUSLY, IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO DO ANYTHING PRODUCTIVE FOR SOCIETY OR YOUR COMMUNITY YOU MIGHT AS WELL DO NOTHING!!!!!!!!

"PEOPLE LIKE YOU MAKE THE WORLD A DISGUSTING AND FUCKED UP PLACE - SELF PITYING MOFOS AND COMPLETE WORTHLESS WASTES OF SPACE THAT THINK THEY HAVE INNER TURMOIL AND DEPRESSION!!!!!!!!

"GO DO SOMETHING WORTH LIVING FOR!!!!!!!!

I'M NOT GOING TO BOTHER DOING ANYTHING WORTH LIVING FOR!! I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER SEEING ANY WORTHLESS PSYCHIATRIST OR THERAPIST EITHER - I'M JUST GOING TO I'M JUST GOING TO TAKE MY FRUSTRATION OUT ON SO MANY THINGS BY DESTROYING THEM!!!!!!!! AND AFTERWARDS I'M JUST GOING TO KILL MYSELF JUST AS ONE PARTICULAR NASTY SPITEFUL VERMIN OF A PERSON CALLED MARIA TOLD ME TO!! I'M JUST GOING TO TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT BY COMMITTING SUICIDE!! AND I DON'T CARE IF I END UP LEAVING BEHIND THE PEOPLE WHOM I'M SUPPOSED TO LOVE BEST BUT NO LONGER MEAN ANYTHING TO ME - BECAUSE I SEE MYSELF AS ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE WHO WOULD BE BETTER OFF DEAD!!

THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I'D RATHER JUST BE COMPLETELY DISABLED AND IN A WHEELCHAIR DRIBBLING - UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE OR DO ANYTHING ELSE AT ALL - THAN BE THE WAY I AM AT THE MOMENT!! OTHER TIMES I FEEL LIKE CHEWING SOME HOMELESS PERSON'S FACE OFF!!
AND ALSO THE REASON WHY I ONLY THINK ABOUT SUICIDE AND NOTHING ELSE IS BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE ALIVE ANYMORE - I WANT TO DIE!!!!!!!!

"YOU WOULDN'T BE BETTER OFF DEAD OR ELSE YOU WOULD BE DEAD!!!!!!!!"

WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE END UP TAKING THEIR OWN LIVES, THEN, IF THEY'RE NOT BETTER OFF DEAD???????? WHY DO SO MANY PEOPLE END UP COMMITTING SUICIDE???????? SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY WANT TO DIE AND BECAUSE THEY HAVEN'T GOT ANYTHING TO LIVE FOR!!!!!!!! SOMETIMES SUICIDE IS THE BEST ANSWER FOR SOME PEOPLE - IF SUICIDE WASN'T A SIN I WOULD CHOOSE TO JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT AND LEAVE BEHIND ALL MY LOVED ONES TO BEAR THE PAIN!!!!!!!!

"YOU ARE IGNORANT!!"

"WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT THEN??"

"HE'S GOING TO THROW HIS WHOLE LIFE AWAY AND SELL HIS SOUL TO THE DEVIL - HE'S ALREADY SHAVED OFF ALL HIS HAIR AND CHANGED HIS NAME!!"

"POOR FUCKING MISERABLE WORTHLESS MISS SPEAKINGUP17!!!!!!!! EVERYONE LET'S ALL TURN OUR ATTENTION TO POOR MISS BITTER SPICE AND START FEELING SORRY FOR HER, SHALL WE?!?!?!?! LET'S ALL HAVE PITY ON THIS FUCKING SOUR-FACED CREATURE WHO HAS NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN SULK IN A FUCKING CORNER SOMEWHERE BECAUSE LIFE HAS BEEN UNKIND TO HER AND BECAUSE SHE HAS BECOME YET ANOTHER VICTIM OF THE UNFRIENDLY UNCARING CRUEL HELLISH EVIL PLACE THAT IS SOCIETY!!!!!!!! WHY DON'T YOU TAKE SOME BATH SALTS???????? IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER!!"

AS FOR ME, I'M JUST GOING TO CONTINUE THANKING GOD FOR MY LIFE AND CARRY ON LIVING - I'M NOT GOING TO BE A COWARD LIKE SOME PEOPLE WHO ARE FULL OF NOTHING BUT SELF-PITY BECAUSE THEIR LIVES ARE "NOT WORTH LIVING" AND BECAUSE THEY SEE THEMSELVES AS "BETTER OFF DEAD"!! AND THE REASON WHY I'M CHOOSING TO BE NASTY AND SPITEFUL ABOUT THOSE WORTHLESS PEOPLE IS BECAUSE THEY'RE NOTHING BUT A COMPLETE WASTE OF SPACE TO THE WHOLE OF SOCIETY!!!!!!!!!!

I HAVE NOTHING BUT PURE HATRED TOWARDS OTHER FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS - I CAN'T STAND OTHER PEOPLE AND I HATE COMING ACROSS OTHER PEOPLE!! I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO LIVE IN THE SAME FUCKING WORTHLESS AREA OR WALK DOWN THE SAME FUCKING STREET AS ANYONE!! I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO CROSS THE SAME FUCKING ROAD OR SHARE THE SAME FUCKING ROAD AS ANYONE WHENEVER DRIVING OR TRAVELING - I WISH I DIDN'T EVEN HAVE TO BE IN THE SAME FUCKING ENVIRONMENT AS ANYONE OR EVEN BREATHE THE SAME FUCKING AIR AS ANYONE!! I WISH EVERYONE WOULD JUST FUCK OFF SOMEWHERE ELSE AND MOVE TO SOME OTHER FUCKING WORTHLESS PLANET!!

THERE ARE MILLIONS OF COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE IN VEGETATIVE CONDITIONS SHOWN ON DOCUMENTARIES WHO ARE DRIBBLING, HAVING TO BE PUSHED AROUND IN WHEELCHAIRS BY HOSPITAL NURSING STAFF AND UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE OR DO ANYTHING ELSE AT ALL!! IF YOU WANT TO BECOME COMPLETELY DISABLED AND END UP LIKE THOSE OTHER COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED RETARDS WHOM YOU BELONG WITH THEN CARRY ON!! CONTINUE BEING IN THE BRAIN-DISABLING CONDITION YOU'RE IN AND CONTINUE STRUGGLING THE WAY YOU'RE DOING!!

AND ALSO RATHER THAN WASTE YOUR FUCKING TIME SCRIBBLING ON BOOKS AND RIPPING YOUR CLOTHES TO SHREDS WITH YOUR FUCKING DIRTY BARE HANDS YOU'D BE A LOT BETTER OFF KILLING YOURSELF SO THAT YOU'LL NO LONGER BE ABLE TO PASS YOUR FRUSTRATION ON ANY MORE STUFF BY DESTROYING THEM - BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT FIT TO BE ON THIS EARTH!!

YOU SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO BE ON THIS EARTH EITHER - YOU SHOULD BE DEAD!!

I'D RATHER BE AMONG THOSE WHO ARE DEAD THAN LIVE THE SORT OF MISERABLE LIFE AND MISERABLE EXISTENCE THAT I'M LIVING, BECAUSE THE WORLD IS NOT A SAFE PLACE FOR DISABLED, VULNERABLE RETARDS LIKE ME!! I SEE MY LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING BECAUSE OF MY CONDITION AND MY SITUATION, AND I FIND THE WORLD A DISGUSTING PLACE TO LIVE IN BECAUSE OF ALL HUMAN BEINGS IN GENERAL!!!!!!!

SOCIETY IS EVIL AND VERY CRUEL - IN FACT THE WHOLE WORLD IS EVIL AND CRUEL!!!!!!!! SOON THIS EARTH WON'T EVEN BE WORTH LIVING ON!!!!!!!!

IF YOU'RE THINKING OF COMMITTING SUICIDE IT'S YOUR LIFE - YOU DO WHAT YOU WANT WITH IT!!

AS LONG AS YOU DON'T TAKE ANYONE ELSE WITH YOU, THAT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!!

ALL I EVER HEAR PEOPLE TALK ABOUT IS SEEING LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING, AND ALL I EVER HEAR OTHER PEOPLE RANT ON ABOUT IS HOW DEPRESSED AND FED UP THEIR ARE WITH LIFE AND HOW THEY'RE HAVING CONSTANT THOUGHTS OF SUICIDE - AS IF I HAVEN'T GOT ENOUGH PROBLEMS OF MY OWN!! MY LIFE IS ALREADY MISERABLE ENOUGH AS IT IS!!!!!!!! I DON'T NEED ANYONE DESTROYING MY LIFE EVEN MORE AND MAKING IT EVEN LESS WORTH LIVING!!!!!!!!

I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT ANY OF YOUR PERSONAL PROBLEMS OR WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH!!!!!!!! AND I REALLY DON'T FUCKING CARE WHAT YOU DO WITH YOUR FUCKED UP LIFE EITHER!!!!!!!! JUMP OFF A FUCKING BALCONY AND END IT ALL FOR ALL ANYONE CARES!!!!!!!!

"ARE YOU GOING TO CARRY ON LIKE THIS FOR THE REST OF YOUR FUCKING MISERABLE LIFE???????? WE HAVE TO FACE THIS EVERY SINGLE FUCKING YEAR, DON'T WE?!?!?!?! STRUGGLING CONSTANTLY WITH EVERYDAY LIFE!!!!!!!!"

"IF I WANT TO TAKE MY FRUSTRATION OUT ON THIS NOVEL - AND ALL THOSE OTHER NOVELS BY SCRIBBLING ALL OVER THEM AND LEAVING FUCKED UP COMMENTS ON THEIR BOOK REVIEWS - THEN I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO DO THAT!! AND IF I WANT TO TAKE MY FRUSTRATION OUT ON SO MANY OTHER THINGS AND ACT LIKE SOME MENTALLY DISABLED RETARD WHOSE EXISTENCE IS A MISERABLE ONE, THEN I SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO DO THAT AS WELL BECAUSE IT'S A FREE FUCKING COUNTRY!!"

"OKAY, BE MY GUEST AND CONTINUE ACTING LIKE A MENTALLY DISABLED RETARD WITH A MISERABLE EXISTENCE!!"

TAKE YOUR ANGER FRUSTRATION OUT ON EVEN MORE THINGS AND DESTROY EVEN MORE STUFF, THEN!! SCRIBBLE ON EVEN MORE BOOKS AND NOVELS - EVEN START RIPPING YOUR CLOTHES TO SHREDS! THEN START ACTING UP IN FRONT OF ALL THOSE OTHER MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE WHOM YOU BELONG WITH AND IN FRONT OF THE SUPPORT WORKERS, BECAUSE YOUR BRAIN IS NO BETTER THAN THAT OF SOMEONE WITH DOWN SYNDROME!! YOU THICKO!!

GO ON!! PISS OFF!! NO ONE WANTS YOU AROUND ANYMORE!!

I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU ANYWHERE NEAR ANY BOOKS EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!! BECAUSE I KNOW YOU'RE GOING TO START SCRIBBLING ON ALL THE LIBRARY BOOKS ONCE YOU GET HOLD OF THEM - JUST AS YOU ALREADY SCRIBBLED ON ALL THOSE OTHER BOOKS AND NOVELS!!!!!!!!

DO US ALL A FAVOR AND KILL YOURSELF SO WE DON'T HAVE THESE RIDICULOUS THREATS ON YOUTUBE: WORTHLESS PEOPLE LIKE YOU REALLY HAVE THE RIGHT TO KILL YOURSELVES; NO ONE’S STOPPING YOU FROM COMMITTING SUICIDE - NO ONE CARES!!!!!!!!

COULD YOU DIE ALREADY - I REALLY DON'T CARE FOR YOUR CAPSLOCK AND I FIND YOU AN ATTENTION WHORE SO HOW ABOUT THAT BITCH YOU MOVE!!!!!!!!

IF YOU WANT TO ACT LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL I'LL TREAT YOU LIKE ONE - BECAUSE YOU'RE NO BETTER THAN A FUCKING ANIMAL ANYWAY!!!!!!!! AND WE ALL KNOW THAT YOU'RE NOT DECEIVING YOURSELF - YOU ARE A LOSER!!!!!!!!

CAN YOU LEAVE THIS BOOK ALONE PLEASE?!?!?!?! BECAUSE IF IT'S NOT YOURS THEN WHY SCRIBBLING ALL OVER IT???????? FUCKING IDIOT!!!!!!!!

IF YOU CAN'T GO INSIDE ANYWHERE WITHOUT BEING VIOLENT OR DESTRUCTIVE, THEN JUST STAY AWAY FROM THAT PLACE!!!!!!!! IN FACT, IT WOULD BE A LOT BETTER IF THE STAFF THREW YOU OUT!!!!!!!!!

LOOK AT YOU DISABLING YOURSELF, AS IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY GOT ENOUGH PROBLEMS!!!!!!!!

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU STARING AT???????? WHY DO YOU KEEP STARING AT ME????????

WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME AS IF I'M A FUCKING ALIEN???????? PISS OFF!!!!!!!!

I CAN'T HELP LOOKING BACK ON MY SAD MISERABLE LIFE AND WISHING THAT THINGS WERE DIFFERENT BECAUSE I ONLY FIND MYSELF STRUGGLING WITH EVERYDAY LIFE EVEN MORE NOW THAN I WAS ALREADY STRUGGLING WITH EVERYDAY LIFE IN THE PAST! AND THEN I CAN'T HELP LOOKING AT ALL MY NON-DISABLED PEERS AND ALL THOSE OTHER YOUNG NON-DISABLED PEOPLE CLOSE TO MY AGE, BECAUSE THEY HAVE A BETTER BRAIN THAN ME!! EVEN MY FELLOW SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS ALSO HAVE A BETTER BRAIN THAN ME, AND I FEEL THAT EVEN THEIR LIVES ARE A LOT BETTER THAN MINE!!

NOT BEING GIVEN A FAIR CHANCE AT BEING LIKE OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE, THAT'S PROBABLY SOMETHING THAT I'LL BE DWELLING ON FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BECAUSE OF ALL THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH AND ALL THE STUFF THAT HAS HAPPENED TO ME!!!!!!!! AND THEN I CAN'T HELP FOCUSING ON JESSICA WHOMES AND ALL THE OTHER SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS FROM HAVERING COLLEGE, INCLUDING THOSE VERY SEVERELY DISABLED SPECIAL NEEDS STUDENTS SUCH AS YEN WAH CHEUNG, BECAUSE THEY MAY HAVE THEIR OWN LEARNING DIFFICULTIES AND THEIR OWN SPECIAL NEEDS - BUT THEY'RE A LOT BETTER OFF THAN ME, AND THEIR LIVES ARE A LOT BETTER THAN MINE, BECAUSE AT LEAST THEIR FAMILIES DON'T FIND THEM DIFFICULT TO LIVE WITH!!!!!!!! AND AT LEAST THEY DIDN'T TAKE THEIR ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OUT ON ANY OF THE LIBRARY BOOKS!!!!!!!!

THE FACT THAT YOU HAVEN'T BEEN GIVEN THE CHANCE TO BE LIKE OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE BECAUSE OF YOUR CONDITION AND YOUR SITUATION, ARE YOU GOING TO BE DWELLING ON THAT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE??

ALSO YOU SHOULDN'T BE FOCUSING ON JESSICA WHOMES OR ANY OF YOUR OTHER FELLOW STUDENTS AT HAVERING AND ALL YOUR OTHER SPECIAL SCHOOLS!!!!!!!! WHY FOCUSING ON THEM????????

CAN YOU STOP BOTHERING THE SUPPORT WORKERS FROM THAT SPECIAL NEEDS ORGANIZATION AND STOP BOTHERING THOSE SPECIAL NEEDS CAB ESCORT PEOPLE AS WELL - AS IF THEY HAVEN'T GOT ENOUGH FUCKING PROBLEMS OF THEIR OWN!!!!!!!! OR YOU THINK THEY'RE NOT HUMAN, THAT THEY'RE FROM ANOTHER FUCKING PLANET?!?!?!?!

YOU WROTE ON THIS, DIDN'T YOU?!?!?!?! THEN WHY DID YOU JUST SAY YOU ALREADY FOUND IT LIKE THAT???????? LOOK!!!!!!!!

THIS COSTS A LOT OF MONEY!!!!!!!! AND YOU'VE WASTED IT!!!!!!!! I CAN'T GIVE THIS TO ANY OTHER STUDENT!!!!!!!

WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING TODAY, THEN?? BECAUSE HOW DO I KNOW WHAT WE'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DOING IF NO ONE EVEN BOTHERS TO GO THROUGH ANYTHING???????
YOU HAVEN'T BEEN LISTENING!!!!!!!! AND I REALLY AM NOT IN THE MOOD TO BE GOING OVER ANYTHING WITH ANYONE!!!!!!!!! I'M JUST NOT IN THE FUCKING MOOD FOR ANYONE OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!
AREN'T YOU???????? WELL, I DON'T CARE!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE THE WAY I MYSELF AM FEELING, I DON'T EVEN FEEL LIKE COMING HERE TO THE DAY CENTER IN THE FIRST PLACE!!!!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE AROUND ANYONE AT THE MOMENT!!!!!!!! I JUST WANT TO BE LEFT ALONE!!!!!!!!

DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHERE THE HOSTEL IS???????? OR ARE YOU JUST DRIVING ANYWHERE????????

OF COURSE HE KNOWS WHERE HE'S GOING!!!!!!!! DON'T BE SARKY!!!!!!!!

ARE YOU THE ONE DRIVING????????

NO!!!!!!!! OF COURSE NOT!!!!!!!!

WELL, BE QUIET, THEN!!!!!!!! I GO WHEREVER I FUCKING WANT TO GO!!!!!!!!

THE REASON WHY I CHOSE TO BE NASTY TOWARDS OTHER FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS IS BECAUSE OF THE WAY I MYSELF HAVE BEEN CRUELLY MISTREATED!!!!!!!! EVERY TIME I SEE THOSE BRAIN-DAMAGED, COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED BASTARDS WHO ARE DRIBBLING, I FEEL LIKE BEATING THEM WITH A STICK IN ANGER - THEN RIPPING THEM TO SHREDS WITH MY FUCKING BARE HANDS!!!!!!!!

IF YOU CHOSE TO BE NASTY TOWARDS OTHER FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS THEN GOD WILL DEAL WITH YOU - AND ALL THOSE OTHER FUCKING WORTHLESS PEOPLE AS WELL!!!!!!!! BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS CAUSING YOUR BITTERNESS ALL OF A SUDDEN!!!!!!!! WHAT ARE YOU GOING THROUGH THAT MILLIONS OF OTHER UNFORTUNATE PEOPLE IN YOUR SITUATION ARE NOT GOING THROUGH AS WELL???????? SERIOUSLY, SORT YOUR FUCKING LIFE OUT!!!!!!!!

THIS IS A DISCIPLINARY THAT I'M GIVING YOU!!!!!!!! BECAUSE ALL I'VE DONE IS HEARD COMPLAINTS ABOUT YOU FROM THE STAFF MEMBERS AND THE OTHER STUDENTS AS WELL!!!!!!!!

BUT THAT SPECIAL NEEDS ASSISTANT, SHE'S NOT TELLING THE TRUTH ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED IN CATERING!!!!!!!! I DIDN'T CALL HER ANY NAMES SUCH AS THICK, AND I WASN'T BEING RUDE TO HER EITHER!!!!!!!! I WAS ONLY ASKING HER TO TEACH ME HOW TO THINK AND FUNCTION SOMEWHERE CLOSE TO MY AGE WHEN IT COMES TO BEING ABLE TO COMMUNICATE AND INTERACT, AND I WAS ONLY ASKING FOR HELP WITH HOW TO LEARN FROM NON-DISABLED PEOPLE WHEN IT COMES TO BEING LIKE OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE!!!!!!!! SHE'S JUST GETTING ME INTO TROUBLE, SHE IS!!!!!!!! JUST AS OTHER PEOPLE ALWAYS GET ME INTO TROUBLE - ESPECIALLY WHEN I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING TO THEM!!!!!!!!

"I CAN'T HELP HAVING THE MENTAL AGE OF SOMEONE FAR YOUNGER THAN ME BECAUSE I'VE GOT TOO MANY LEARNING DIFFICULTIES AND MENTAL DISABILITIES!!!!!!!! AND IT'S BECAUSE I'VE GOT LEARNING DIFFICULTIES THAT I'VE BEEN CRUELLY TREATED LIKE DIRT - EVEN BY MY OWN FAMILY MEMBERS!!!!!!!!" THAT'S NO EXCUSE FOR YOU TO START PASSING YOUR FRUSTRATION ON SO MANY THINGS AND BEHAVING THE WAY YOU'RE DOING TOWARDS THE OTHER STUDENTS!!!!!!!! ABSOLUTELY NO EXCUSE AT ALL!!!!!!!! DO YOU UNDERSTAND???????? AND ALSO, I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY OF THIS "WILL EVERYONE JUST SHUT THEIR FUCKING MOUTHS!!!!!!!! I'VE GOT A FUCKING HEADACHE!!!!!!!!" - BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT A TEENAGER!!!!!!!! AND YOU'RE NOT A YOUNG ADULT IN THEIR EARLY TWENTIES EITHER!!!!!!!! YOU'RE A COMPLETELY PROPER FULLY GROWN PERSON!!!!!!!!

I DON’T EVEN KNOW THAT I’M ACTING AND THINKING LIKE A TEENAGER OR YOUNG ADULT, AND I CAN’T HELP IT, BECAUSE I’M VERY MENTALLY SLOW ESPECIALLY AT LEARNING!!!!!!!! NO WONDER I LABEL MYSELF AS MENTALLY DISABLED AND RETARDED, AND NO WONDER I DON’T BOTHER SOCIALIZING WITH ABLE-MINDED YOUNG PEOPLE; I ONLY HANG AROUND MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE SUCH AS THOSE WITH DOWN SYNDROME, BECAUSE I BELONG WITH PEOPLE LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!

IT'S FRUSTRATING BEING A FULLY GROWN ADULT WITH MENTAL DISABILITIES BECAUSE I SEEM TO FIND EVERYTHING IN LIFE UNUSUALLY DIFFICULT!!!!!!!! I SEEM TO STRUGGLE CONSTANTLY WITH EVERYDAY LIFE!!!!!!!! AND I SEE MYSELF AS A MENTALLY DISABLED ADULT, BECAUSE I CAN'T HELP HAVING THE ACTUAL BRAIN OF A KID!!!!!!!! IN FACT, I DON'T EVEN FEEL MENTALLY YOUNGER THAN I REALLY AM - I JUST FEEL COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED AND MENTALLY RETARDED!!!!!!!!!

IT'S MORE IRRITATING THAN IF YOU DON'T SAY IT, REALLY, BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE HAVE GOT THEIR OWN PROBLEMS!!!!!!!! IF YOU WERE LIVING IN A SPECIAL NEEDS RESIDENTIAL GROUP HOME FOR MENTALLY DISABLED ADULTS, AND THE SUPPORT WORKERS WERE HAVING TO PUT UP WITH YOU AND ALL THOSE OTHER MENTALLY DISABLED RESIDENTIAL PATIENTS, THEY'D JUST END UP GETTING IRRITABLE AND SNAPPY WITH YOU!!!!!!!! AND THEN YOU SHOULDN'T PASS YOUR FRUSTRATION ON THOSE NOVELS BY SCRIBBLING ON THEM AND DESTROYING THEM, BECAUSE THEY COST A LOT OF MONEY!!!!!!!! AND YOU'LL ONLY END UP HAVING TO PAY FOR THEM!!!!!!!!

PERHAPS LAURA SADLER DESERVED TO DIE MORE THAN ANYTHING!!!!!!!!! SHE HAD IT COMING, ANYWAY!!!!!!!!! THERE ARE TOO MANY VILE BASTARDS IN THE WORLD WHO WOULD HAVE BEEN FAR BETTER OFF DEAD, AND LAURA SADLER WAS ONE OF THOSE PIECE OF SHIT WORTHLESS PEOPLE!!!!!!!!
PEOPLE SHOULD JUST GET OVER HER DEATH, AND JUST FORGET ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE EVER EVEN EXISTED!!!!!!!! BECAUSE I WOULD, IF I HAD KNOWN HER!!!!!!!!
THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE GOING TO LAURA SADLER'S GRAVE AND DESTROYING IT IN ANGER BY VANDALIZING IT - AS MEANS OF LASHING OUT!!!!!!!!! I ALSO FEEL LIKE DESTROYING AND VANDALIZING SO MANY OTHER FUCKING PLACES AS WELL!!!!!!!!!

YOU NASTY SPITEFUL VERMIN OF A PERSON!!!!!!!! YOU MAKE ME SICK!!!!!!!!
I REALLY DON'T NEED ANY MOTHER FUCKING WORTHLESS COCKSUCKER RESPONDING TO ANY OF MY NASTY COMMENTS, IF YOU DON'T MIND!!!!!!!! YOU'RE BETTER OFF JUST KEEPING YOUR FUCKING MOUTH SHUT!!!!!!!!
SICK COW!!!!!!!!! DO YOU GET THRILLS FROM BEHIND YOUR KEYBOARD???????? GET A LIFE!!!!!!!!

TO TRACEY ODEYEMI: PERHAPS THE WORLD WOULD BE BETTER WITHOUT VILE BASTARDS LIKE YOU!!!!!!!!

I REALLY DON'T CARE THAT YOU SEE ME AS A NASTY SPITEFUL VERMIN OF A PERSON OR THAT I MAKE YOU SICK, BECAUSE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING HUMAN BEING ON EARTH MAKES ME EVEN SICKER!!!!!!!! YOU ALL MAKE ME EVEN SICKER!!!!!!!!

OH DO GO AWAY YOU IRRITATING LITTLE CREATURE!!!!!!!!

YOU MAY AS WELL TALK TO THE BRICK WALL, BECAUSE I'M NOT LISTENING!!!!!!!!!!!

WHY REPLY, THEN????????? DO ONE!!!!!!!!!! DON'T RESPOND TO THIS MESSAGE EITHER!!!!!!!!!

WHAT IF I FINALLY REACH THE END OF MY TETHER AND START DESTROYING AND VANDALIZING SO MANY PLACES IN ANGER????????

WHAT IF MY ISSUES SHOULD FINALLY ESCALATE TO SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS VANDALISM, AND WHAT IF I'VE FINALLY HAD ENOUGH OF EVERYTHING IN LIFE THAT ALL OF A SUDDEN I SHOULD FINALLY SNAP AND DECIDE TO START TAKING MY ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OUT ON SO MANY THINGS AND PLACES BY VANDALIZING PUBLIC PROPERTIES, LIBRARIES, YOUNG DEAD PEOPLE'S GRAVES, ETC - AS MEANS OF LASHING OUT AT THE WHOLE WORLD? BECAUSE AT THE MOMENT THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M THINKING OF DOING - RATHER THAN BOTHER TURNING TO ANY MENTAL DISABILTY PSYCHIATRIST OR SPECIAL NEEDS THERAPIST OR ANYONE ELSE!!

I'VE ALREADY BEEN TAKING MY FRUSTRATION OUT ON MY BOOKS AND NOVELS BY SCRIBBLING ALL OVER THEM - SOMETHING THAT I'VE ALREADY BEEN DOING MY WHOLE LIFE! I'VE EVEN STARTED TEARING AND RIPPING UP MY CLOTHES TO SHREDS AS WELL - SOMETHING THAT I'VE NOW ONLY JUST STARTED DOING!! THAT'S HOW DEPRESSED AND BITTER I AM ABOUT LIFE AND EVERYTHNG IN IT!! I FEEL THAT LIFE HAS BEEN CRUEL AND UNKIND TO ME - AND TO THOSE IN THE SAME SITUATION AS ME!!!!!!!! BY HAVING THOUGHTS OF DESTRUCTION AND VANDALISM, I'M LETTING GOD KNOW JUST HOW MUCH I'M SUFFERING!!!!!!!!

NO WONDER SO MANY YOUNG PEOPLE IN THEIR TWENTIES AND THIRTIES END UP TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT BY TAKING THEIR OWN LIVES AND LEAVING BEHIND THEIR LOVED ONES, BECAUSE LIFE IS NOT WORTH LIVING - ESPECIALLY NOT FOR PEOPLE LIKE ME!!!!!!!!! AND OTHER PEOPLE HAVEN'T HELPED THE SITUATION AT ALL - THEY'VE ONLY MADE ME FEEL EVEN MORE DEPRESSED AND EVEN MORE SUICIDAL!!!!!!!! OTHER PEOPLE HAVE ONLY MADE ME SEE LIFE AS EVEN LESS WORTH LIVING!!!!!!!

PERHAPS SUICIDE IS THE BEST OPTION FOR SOMEONE LIKE ME!!!!!!!! BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH I DIDN'T CHOOSE TO BE LIKE THIS AND DIDN'T CHOOSE THIS SORT OF LIFE, I OFTEN FEEL THAT PERHAPS THE WORLD WOULD BE A LOT BETTER WITHOUT WORTHLESS WASTE OF SPACE VILE BASTARDS LIKE MYSELF IN IT!!!!!!!!

THAT'S CRYING OUT FOR HELP, THAT IS!!!!!!!!

BUT WHY WOULD YOU EVEN DO THAT?? WHY WOULD YOU GO SO FAR AS TO START RIPPING YOUR CLOTHES TO SHREDS??

WELL THIS IS JUST COMPLETELY POINTLESS - IT WILL ONLY GET YOU INTO TROUBLE WITH THE POLICE IF YOU START VANDALIZING PUBLIC PROPERTY!!!!!!!! IF YOU DO IT TO YOUR OWN PROPERTY NOT ONLY DO YOU HURT YOURSELF BUT YOU END UP HURTING YOUR LOVED ONES AS WELL!!!!!!!! YOU NEED TO GROW UP AND START DEALING WITH THINGS IN A MORE MATURE WAY!!!!!!!!

YOU NEED HELP! YES REALLY! IF YOU DON'T THINK SO THEN YOU SHOULD READ ALL YOUR WORTHLESS COMMENTS ON YOUTUBE AND THINK ABOUT IT!!!!!!!!!! AND ALSO IF YOU HATE EVERYONE ON EARTH AND THINK THIS EARTH IS NOT WORTH LIVING ON THEN WHY THE HELL DON'T YOU JUST DECIDE TO COMMIT SUICIDE INSTEAD OF WASTING YOUR FUCKING TIME BY SCRIBBLING ON THOSE FUCKING BOOKS AND TYPING WITH YOUR DIRTY BARE HANDS ON YOUTUBE???????? YOU ARE RETARDED!!!!!!!!!

I WISH I HAD A BETTER BRAIN THAN THE ONE I'M STUCK WITH AT THE MOMENT SO THAT PERHAPS I WOULDN'T FIND THE WORLD CONFUSING AND FRIGHTENING!!!!!!!! I MAY NOT BE COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED BUT I MIGHT AS WELL BE - BECAUSE I SEE MYSELF AS NO BETTER THAN SOMEONE WITH DOWN SYNDROME WHEN IT COMES TO BEING MENTALLY DISABLED AND RETARDED!!!!!!!! I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER SEEING ANY FUCKING WORTHLESS PSYCHIATRIST OR THERAPIST AND I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER GETTING ANY HELP FOR MY CONDITION EITHER - I'M JUST GOING TO COMMIT SUICIDE ONE DAY!!!!!!!! I'M JUST GOING TO END IT ALL!!!!!!!! I'VE GONE FROM BEING A GENTLE PERSON TO AN ANGRY VIOLENT DESTRUCTIVE CREATURE - EVEN I MYSELF DON'T KNOW WHO I AM ANYMORE!!!!!!!!

I'M ALREADY ON FUCKING ANTIDEPRESSANTS BECAUSE OF FAMILY PROBLEMS AND TOO MANY OTHER PROBLEMS!!!!!!!! MY LIFE IS ALREADY FUCKING MISERABLE ENOUGH AS IT IS - I DON'T NEED ANYONE ESPECIALLY THOSE IN THE FUCKING OUTSIDE WORLD MAKING MY LIFE EVEN MORE MISERABLE AND EVEN MORE UNBEARABLE!!!!!!!!

I WISH I COULD JUST BE HELPED BY OTHERS WHENEVER I TRY TO LEARN HOW TO THINK AND FUNCTION AT THE MENTAL LEVEL OF SOMEONE CLOSE TO MY OWN AGE RATHER THAN HAVE OTHER PEOPLE FEEL THE NEED TO REMIND ME THAT I'M NOT A BABY AND THEN BEING VERY CRUEL TOWARDS ME IN REGARDS TO MY VERY LIMITED MENTAL AGE - BUT THE WORLD IS A STUPID, CRUEL AND FUCKED UP PLACE TO LIVE IN; THE WHOLE WORLD IS SICK!!

GOD SAID THAT THE WORLD WAS GOING TO GET WORSE, AND IT IS; MORE AND MORE LIVES BEING UNTIMELY CUT SHORT ALL BECAUSE OF MORE AND MORE PEOPLE KILLING THEMSELVES ALONG WITH OTHER PEOPLE - EVEN EATING OTHER PEOPLE'S FACES AND EATING EACH OTHER!!

SOON THIS WORLD WON'T EVEN BE WORTH LIVING IN BECAUSE THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD WILL BE FULL OF FACE-EATING ZOMBIES AND SEVERELY BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY DISABLED VEGETABLES WHO ARE UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE OR DO ANYTHING ELSE AT ALL!!!!!!!!

AND I'D RATHER THE WHOLE WORLD WAS ONLY FULL OF BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY DISABLED VEGETABLES AND FACE-EATING ZOMBIES; I'D RATHER PEOPLE STARTED EATING OFF OTHER PEOPLE'S FACES AND EATING EACH OTHER - JUST LIKE THAT FACE-EATER RUDY EUGENE!!!!!!!! IN FACT I'D RATHER PEOPLE DIDN'T ACT HUMAN; WE SHOULDN'T ACT EITHER - BECAUSE AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED WE'RE NOT HUMAN!!

THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I JUST WANT TO MOVE TO ANOTHER FUCKING PLANET BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO FUCKING GET AS FAR AWAY FROM THIS FUCKING WORTHLESS FUCKED UP PLANET AS POSSIBLE!!!!!!!!

THE WHOLE WORLD IS GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY!!

IF I HAD A CHOICE I WOULD LEAVE THIS EARTH PERMANENTLY AND MOVE SOMEWHERE FAR AWAY SUCH AS PLANET MARS - I WISH I COULD GET AWAY FROM THIS NASTY EVIL PLANET AND ITS NASTY EVIL INHABITANTS!!

WELL TOUGH!!!!!!! YOU CAN'T MOVE TO ANOTHER PLANET - SO JUST GET OVER IT!!!!!!!!

WHO WAS IT THAT DESTROYED THIS PARTICULAR BOOK???????? WAS IT THE SAME PERSON WHO DESTROYED ALL THOSE OTHER BOOKS AS WELL???????? I’M SURE IT WAS !!!!!!!!

I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER WRITING A LETTER TO YOUR PARENTS - I'M JUST GOING TO PHONE YOUR FATHER AND TELL HIM WHAT YOU'VE DONE!!!!!!!!

YOU ARE A NUTCASE!! ONLY A NUTCASE WOULD START SAYING ALL THOSE HORRIFIC THINGS!!!!!!!!

HUMAN BEINGS ARE VERY CRUEL AND DISGUSTINGLY EVIL!!!!!!!! NO ONE SEEMS TO UNDERSTAND THAT BY ACCUSING SOMEONE OF BEING MISERABLE AND RUDE TOWARDS OTHERS, THEY'LL ONLY CAUSE THAT PERSON TO START FEELING EVEN MORE DEPRESSED AND EVEN MORE SUICIDAL THAN THEY ALREADY ARE, BECAUSE THEY'RE ONLY ADDING TO THAT PERSON'S DEPRESSION!!!!!!!!
NO WONDER SO MANY PEOPLE END UP TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT AND LEAVING BEHIND THEIR LOVED ONES - NO WONDER SO MANY PEOPLE SEE LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING!!!!!!!!

I FEEL LIKE FUCKING RUNNING AWAY AND NEVER COMING BACK - EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW WHERE I'LL RUN TO - BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO FUCKING GET AS FAR AWAY FROM EVERYONE AS POSSIBLE!! I REALLY DON'T CARE IF I END UP GOING MISSING, AND I DON'T EVEN CARE IF I END UP LEAVING BEHIND THE PEOPLE WHOM I'M SUPPOSED TO LOVE BEST!! THEY DON'T MEAN ANYTHING TO ME ANYMORE - IN FACT NOTHING MEANS ANYTHING TO ME ANYMORE!!

IF YOU HATE THIS PARTICULAR BOOK SO MUCH, WHY ARE YOU LURKING ON THIS FUCKING BOOK REVIEW WEBSITE, AND WHY ARE YOU VANDALIZING THE FUCKING BOOK REVIEW OF THIS PARTICULAR BOOK AND ALL THOSE OTHER BOOKS AS WELL???????? YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!!!!!! WHY DON'T YOU FUCK OFF SOMEWHERE AND DIE INSTEAD???????? IT WOULD BE A LOT BETTER FOR EVERYONE ELSE IF YOU JUST JUMPED OFF A FUCKING BALCONY!!!!!!!!

"I GET THAT DEPRESSED WHENEVER LOOKING BACK ON MY LIFE (ESPECIALLY MY TEENS AND TWENTIES) THAT I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE ALIVE ANYMORE BECAUSE OF ALL THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH - AND BECAUSE IT WASN'T WHAT I WANTED!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE ON THIS EARTH ANYMORE, AND I SEE LIFE AS NOT WORTH LIVING, BECAUSE I FIND THE WORLD A CRUEL, CONFUSING, AND FRIGHTENING PLACE"!!!!!!!!! I WOULDN'T EVEN EXPECT A SEVERELY MENTALLY DISABLED PERSON YOUR AGE - LET ALONE ANYONE - TO BE SAYING SUCH HORRIFIC THINGS!!!!!!!!

THOSE WHO DECIDED TO JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT BY COMMITTING SUICIDE, THEY'RE NOTHING BUT COWARDS!! IT'S AS SIMPLE AS THAT!!

THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE SLAMMING MY FUCKING HEAD AGAINST THE FUCKING BRICK WALL AND BANGING MY FUCKING HAND AGAINST MY FUCKING HEAD -IN FACT, I EVEN FEEL LIKE SMASHING MY FUCKING HEAD THROUGH THE FUCKING WINDOW!!!!!!!! IT'S NOW GOTTEN TO THE EXTENT WHERE I ALSO FEEL LIKE FUCKING RIPPING MY CLOTHES TO SHREDS AND RIPPING EVERYTHING ELSE AROUND ME TO SHREDS AS WELL !!!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE FUCKING RUNNING AWAY, EVEN THOUGH I DON'T KNOW WHERE I WOULD RUN TO, BECAUSE I JUST WANT TO GET AS FAR AWAY FROM EVERYONE AND EVERYTHING AS POSSIBLE!!!!!!!

"THE REASON WHY I'M PASSING MY FRUSTRATION ON SO MANY THINGS INCLUDING BOOKS IS BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH I'M SUFFERING AND BECAUSE NO ONE CARES ABOUT DISABLED PEOPLE IN MY SITUATION - NOT EVEN MY OWN FAMILY MEMBERS CARE ABOUT ME!!!!!!!!! NO ONE SEEMS TO CARE ABOUT UNFORTUNATE PEOPLE LIKE ME!!!!!!!! THEY ONLY CARE ABOUT THEMSELVES, AND THEY'RE ONLY OUT FOR THEMSELVES!!!!!!!! THAT'S WHY I'M LASHING OUT AT THE WHOLE WORLD BE TAKING MY ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OUT ON ALL THOSE NOVELS!!!!!!!! THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE DESTROYING SO MANY PLACES IN ANGER BY VANDALIZING THEM - AS MEANS OF LASHING OUT!!!!!!!!"

CUNT!!!!!!!!!

BY PASSING MY FRUSTRATION ON ALL THOSE NOVELS I'M LASHING OUT AT THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!!!!! THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE DESTROYING SO MANY PLACES IN ANGER AND FRUSTRATION BY VANDALIZING THEM - AS MEANS OF LASHING OUT!!!!!!!! I EVEN FEEL LIKE GOING TO THE GRAVEYARD AND DESTROYING AND VANDALIZING ALL THE GRAVES THERE!!!!!!!! IF I HAD THE CHANCE, I WOULD DESTROY EVERYTHING AROUND ME, BECAUSE I'VE NOW REACHED THE COMPLETE END OF MY TETHER WITH LIFE AND EVERYTHING IN IT!!!!!!!!

THIS IS A CRY FOR HELP!!!!!!!! I'M CRYING OUT FOR HELP, AND ALL I EVER WANT IS TO BE HELPED, FOR SOMEONE OUT THERE TO HELP ME!!!!!!!!

I DREAD EVERY SINGLE DAY THAT COMES BY, BECAUSE I SEE MYSELF HAVING TO BE LOOKED AFTER FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!! I MIGHT EVEN HAVE TO BE SENT AWAY TO SOME INSTITUTION FOR ADULTS WITH MENTAL DISABILITIES!!!!!!!!!! I FEEL THAT I NEED TO BE LOOKED AFTER BY CARING AND SUPPORTING STAFF, EVEN THOUGH MY LEARNING DIFFICULTIES ARE NOT ALL THAT SEVERE!!!!!!!! THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I CAN'T SEE ANY FUTURE IN FRONT OF ME AT ALL - EXCEPT ONE OF CONSTANT DAILY STRUGGLE AND SUFFERING!!!!!!!!

I SEEM TO FIND EVERYTHING IN LIFE UNUSUALLY HARD, AND I SEEM TO FIND EVERYDAY LIFE AN UNUSUAL STRUGGLE BECAUSE OF MY CONDITION AND BECAUSE OF THE HELLISH PRISON-LIKE SITUATION I'M IN!!!!!! IT'S FRUSTRATING ENOUGH THAT HAVEN'T BEEN GIVEN THE CHANCE TO BE LIKE OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE BECAUSE OF BEING UNABLE TO FUNCTION PROPERLY AT THE EXPECTED MENTAL LEVEL OF SOMEONE CLOSE TO MY AGE AND BECAUSE MY FAMILY MEMBERS AND SO MANY OTHER PEOPLE OFTEN ACCUSE ME OF DWELLING ON MY MENTAL DISABILITY - EVEN THOUGH I'M NOT!!! !!!!!!!! I WISH I COULD BE HELPED WHEN IT COMES TO TRYING TO LEARN FROM OTHER YOUNG PEOPLE CLOSE TO MY AGE!!!!!!!! I WISH I COULD BE HELPED WITH LEARNING HOW TO GRADUALLY ACQUIRE THE BRAIN AND MIND OF A YOUNG ADULT AND BEING ABLE TO DEVELOP PROPERLY SO THAT I'D BE ABLE TO COMMUNICATE AT THE SAME MENTAL LEVEL OF YOUNG ADULTS CLOSE TO MY AGE!!!! AND ALSO I WISH I COULD JUST BE HELPED WITH LEARNING HOW TO ACT AND THINK LIKE A YOUNG ADULT - INSTEAD OF OTHER PEOPLE FEELING THE NEED TO REMIND ME THAT I'M NOT A BABY AND BEING VERY CRUELLY NASTY TOWARDS ME IN REGARDS TO MY VERY LIMITED MENTAL AGE BY ACCUSING ME OF ACTING AND THINKING LIKE A BABY!!!!!!!! AND I ALSO MY FAMILY WOULD STOP ACCUSING ME OF DWELLING ON MY CONDITION AND MY SITUATION, BECAUSE THAT IS ONLY CAUSING ME TO STRUGGLE EVEN MORE!! MY WHOLE LIFE IS A NIGHTMARE AND EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR ME IS A NIGHTMARE - BUT OF COURSE NO ONE SEEMS TO UNDERSTAND THAT BECAUSE THE WORLD IS A STUPID CRUEL NASTY PLACE TO LIVE IN!!!!!!!!

YOU SEEM TO WHINGE ABOUT EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!

WHY WOULDN'T I WHINGE ABOUT EVERYTHING IN LIFE?? BECAUSE I'M FRUSTRATED BY MY MENTAL (AND DEVELOPMENTAL) DISABILITY!! I'M FRUSTRATED BY THE WAY I AM AND THE SITUATION I'M IN!! AND I HAVE A VERY SAD MISERABLE EXISTENCE!!

THE REASON WHY THE MENTALLY DISABLED PASS THEIR FRUSTRATION ON SO MANY THINGS IS BECAUSE THEY CAN'T HELP IT AND BECAUSE THEY'RE CRYING OUT FOR HELP!!!!!!!! PERHAPS YOU SHOULD EDUCATE YOURSELVES ABOUT MENTAL DISABILITIES AND RAISE AWARENESS ON BRAIN PROBLEMS AND GENETIC BRAIN DISORDERS SO THAT YOU'LL UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH SUFFERING THE MENTALLY AND DEVELOPMENTALLY DISABLED ARE GOING THROUGH!!!!!!!!

I DON'T BOTHER LOOKING AT NON-DISABLED PEOPLE I ONLY LOOK AT BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE WHO ARE DRIBBLING AND UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE OR WALK OR DO ANYTHING ELSE AT ALL IS BECAUSE I'D RATHER BE ONE OF THOSE PEOPLE THAT BE THE WAY I AM AT THE MOMENT!!!!!!!! PERHAPS IT WOULD BE A LOT BETTER FOR ME IF I BECAME COMPLETELY DISABLED!!!!!!!! BECAUSE THEN, AT LEAST I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO PASS MY FRUSTRATION ON ANYTHING OR DESTROY ANYTHING - EVEN THOUGH I WOULD HAVE TO DEPEND ON NURSING STAFF TO PUSH ME AROUND IN A MENTALLY DISABLED PERSON'S WHEELCHAIR, AND EVEN THOUGH I WOULD HAVE TO BE DUMPED WITH OTHER MENTALLY DISABLED PEOPLE!!!!!!!!

I'D RATHER NOT BE AROUND NON-DISABLED PEOPLE AT ALL!!!!!!!! I'D RATHER BE AROUND OTHER DISABLED PEOPLE AND OTHER PEOPLE WITH LEARNING DIFFICULTIES, INCLUDING THOSE WHO ARE IN WHEELCHAIRS, BECAUSE I CAN ONLY RELATE TO THOSE TYPES OF PEOPLE!!!!!!!!! I CAN'T RELATE TO ABLE-MINDED PEOPLE WITHOUT ANY BRAIN PROBLEM OR MENTAL DISABILITY!!!!!!!!! AND THEN IF I'M GOING TO HAVE SOME MENTAL DISABILITY THAT USUALLY AFFECTS BOYS, THEN PERHAPS I DON'T WANT TO BE A GIRL!!!!!!!!I PERHAPS I DON'T EVEN WANT TO BE FEMALE - BECAUSE UP THERE MENTALLY I FEEL MORE LIKE A MAN THAN A WOMAN!!!!!!!! THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED DRESSING AND ACTING LIKE A LESBIAN, AND NOT A NORMAL FEMALE!!!!!!!! I CAN'T WEAR ANYTHING THAT I WOULD WANT TO WEAR THAT MOST NORMAL FEMALES WOULD BE FREE TO WEAR!!!!!!!! AT THE SAME TIME, I MAY NOT BE COMPLETELY DISABLED AND IN A WHEELCHAIR, DRIBBLING, BUT I MIGHT AS WELL BE, BECAUSE I FEEL JUST AS SEVERELY DISABLED AS ALL THOSE BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED BASTARDS WHOSE BEHAVIORAL PROBLEMS ARE EVEN MORE VIOLENT AND DESTRUCTIVE THAN MINE ARE!!!!!!!!

THERE ARE TIMES WHEN I FEEL LIKE GOING TO THAT HOLBY CITY BITCH LAURA SADLER'S GRAVE AND DESTROYING IT IN ANGER BY VANDALIZING IT - AS MEANS OF LASHING OUT!!!!!!!! I ALSO FEEL LIKE DIGGING UP HER CORPSE AND RIPPING IT TO SHREDS - THEN EATING OFF HER ROTTING FACE IN THE EXACT SAME WAY THAT FACE EATING MAN ATE OFF THAT HOMELESS MAN'S FACE BEFORE HE WAS SHOT AND KILLED!!!!!!!! I SEE MYSELF AS NOT HUMAN - AND I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BOTHER ACTING HUMAN EITHER!!!!!!!! FROM NOW ON, I'M JUST GOING TO ACT LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL!!!!!!!!

"WHAT HAS THAT FACE EATING MAN GOT TO DO WITH THIS PARTICULAR NOVEL???????? AND WHY CHOOSE TO COMPARE YOURSELF TO PEOPLE LIKE HIM OF ALL PEOPLE???????? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TURNING INTO????????"

"WHAT I WANT IS TO END UP DYING THE SAME WAY LAURA SADLER DID!!!!!!!!! EXCEPT THAT I'M THINKING OF COMMITTING SUICIDE BY GETTING HOLD OF A BOTTLE OF PILLS AND TAKING A FATAL OVERDOSE - THEN JUMPING OFF A BALCONY JUST AS LAURA SADLER FELL FROM THAT BALCONY!!!!!!!!! AND AFTER I'VE BEEN IN A COMA FOR SEVERAL DAYS, I HOPE THE NHS ALLOWS ME TO DIE!!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE IT'S HARD TO IMAGINE A SADDER LIFE THAN MINE IS AT THE MOMENT!!!!!!!!"

NO ONE BLAMED LUCY FOR WILMOT'S SUICIDE, BUT SHE BLAMED HERSELF!!!!!!!!

AT TIMES, SHE WAS ANGRY AT HIM!!!!!!!! HOW COULD HE HAVE DONE THAT TO HER???????? HOW DARED HE JUST TAKE THE EASY WAY OUT AND LEAVE HER WITH THIS PAIN!!!!!!!! HE WAS NOTHING BUT A COWARD, SHE RAGED, AND A COMPLETE WORTHLESS WASTE OF SPACE TO EVERYONE ELSE ON THIS EARTH!!!!!!!!! HE'D BEEN UNABLE TO COPE WITH THE UNBEARABLE SUFFERING HE WAS GOING THROUGH, SO HE'D DROPPED OUT AND DECIDED TO LEAVE BEHIND THE PEOPLE WHOM HE WAS SUPPOSED TO LOVE BEST!!!!!!!!

THAT BRITISH SOAP ACTRESS LAURA SADLER (FROM HOLBY CITY) WHO DIED AFTER JUMPING 40FT FROM THAT BALCONY, IF SHE HADN'T BEEN CREMATED I WOULD DESTROY AND VANDALIZE HER GRAVE THEN DIG UP HER CORPSE AND CHEW OFF THE WHOLE OF HER FACE - EXCEPT THE WAY I WOULD FUCKING DESTROY THAT FUCKING BITCH'S CORPSE WOULD BE EVEN WORSE THAN WHAT RUDY EUGENE DID TO RONALD POPPO'S FACE!!

“OH MY GOD, THE WORLD HAS TRULY BECOME AN UGLY PLACE!! !! !! !! !!”

“THIS IS HORRIBLE - THE WHOLE WORLD IS GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY!! !! !! !!”

“WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TOO?! ?! ?! ?!”

FACE EATING MAN RUDY EUGENE SHOT AND KILLED BY POLICE!!

"I'VE ALREADY BEEN PASSING MY FRUSTRATION ON ALL THOSE BOOKS AND NOVELS BY SCRIBBLING ALL OVER THEM - SOMETHING THAT I'VE ALREADY BEEN DOING THROUGHOUT MY WHOLE FUCKING MISERABLE LIFE!! I'VE EVEN STARTED RIPPING MY CLOTHES TO SHREDS IN FRUSTRATION - SOMETHING THAT I'VE ONLY JUST STARTED DOING!! THAT IS HOW MUCH I'M SUFFERING!!" YOU'D BE A LOT BETTER OFF COMMITTING SUICIDE BECAUSE PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE BETTER OFF DEAD!!

PERHAPS IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A LOT BETTER FOR EVERYONE IF YOU WERE JUST COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED AND IN A WHEELCHAIR DRIBBLING - JUST LIKE ALL THOSE OTHER BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED BASTARDS WHOM YOU BELONG WITH!!!!!!!!

WHY ARE MORE AND MORE PEOPLE COMMITTING SUICIDE?? WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO??

WHAT IN FUCK’S NAME IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?? MOST ESPECIALLY WHAT TYPE OF FUCKED UP HUMAN BEING IS BEING BRED THESE DAYS?? THEN THEY BLAME THE HIGH SUICIDE RATE AMONGST YOUNG PEOPLE IN THEIR 20S AND 30S ON DEPRESSION – WHEN IF ANYTHING THEY SHOULD BE FUCKING BLAMING THEMSELVES AND EACH OTHER!!!!!!!! I CAN'T CONSIDER MYSELF OR ANYONE ELSE ON THIS FUCKING WORTHLESS PLANET HUMAN ANYMORE BECAUSE WE'RE NOT HUMAN - WE'RE SUBHUMAN!! AND ALSO AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED LIFE WASN'T MEANT TO BE LIVED - ONLY TAKEN AWAY!! THAT'S WHY PEOPLE ARE TAKING THE EASY WAY OUT AND LEAVING BEHIND THEIR LOVED ONES!!

“I FEAR FOR MY CHILDREN GROWING UP IN THIS WORLD! ! ! ! ! ! ! !”

“I HAVE BEEN PUT OFF HAVING CHILDREN THE OLDER I GET; VERY REASONS SUCH AS THIS TOOK ME FROM BEING MATERNAL TO BEING SELFISH AND NOT WANTING TO HAVE A CHILD IN ORDER TO PROTECT IT FROM HAVING TO GROW UP IN THIS NASTY EVIL WORLD!”

“THAT IS NOT SELFISH TO NOT HAVE CHILDREN - IT IS SMART!”

“THERE IS NOTHING SELFISH ABOUT NOT WANTING CHILDREN!”

“THAT’S WHY I’VE DECIDED NOT TO HAVE ANY!”

TIME TO MOVE - PLANETS!!

"EARTH IS GOING DOWNHILL!!"

"DIDN'T YOU HEAR THE NEWS? - "TIME TO MOVE PLANETS!!""

"OBVIOUSLY THIS IS A CONVERSATION THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!!"

WHEN ARE MORE PEOPLE GOING TO START EATING OTHER PEOPLE’S FACES AND EATING EACH OTHER AND WHEN WILL THERE BE MORE FACE-EATING ZOMBIES BEING SHOT AND KILLED BY POLICE?? I’D RATHER SEE HORRIFIC STUFF LIKE THAT THAN ANYTHING ELSE!! WHAT I WANT IS TO SEE PEOPLE TURN ON EACH OTHER – THAT’S HOW FULL OF HATRED I AM TOWARDS OTHER FELLOW HUMAN BEINGS!!

“WE’RE NO LONGER ALLOWED TO BORROW ANY MORE BOOKS OR NOVELS FROM THE LIBRARY ALL BECAUSE OF ALL THOSE FUCKING WASTE OF SPACE BRAIN-DAMAGED COMPLETELY MENTALLY DISABLED DRIBBLING BASTARDS WHO HAVE BEEN PASSING THEIR FRUSTRATION ON THOSE LIBRARY BOOKS AND NOVELS, SO FROM NOW WE’RE JUST GOING TO ACT LIKE FUCKING ANIMALS AND START ATTACKING ONE ANOTHER! THE POLICE DON’T CARE WHETHER WE DECIDE TO START EATING ONE ANOTHER OR NOT; AFTER ALL THAT’S WHAT THEY AND OTHER PEOPLE WANT - FOR US TO TURN ON EACH OTHER!!!!!!!! PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT WANTING TO DIE AS IF NO ONE HAS ANYTHING TO LIVE FOR! AND THESE DAYS HUMAN LIFE DOESN’T MEAN ANYTHING TO ANYBODY ANYMORE – MAKES YOU WONDER WHAT THIS ALREADY FUCKED UP WORLD IS COMING TO!!!!!!!! I FEEL SORRY FOR OUR CHILDREN!!!!!!!!

"IF I DIDN’T ALREADY HAVE CHILDREN I WOULDN’T BOTHER HAVING ANY - THIS WORLD IS NO LONGER A SAFE PLACE TO BRING THEM UP SAFELY IN!!"

"I TOTALLY AGREE: I WOULDN'T BOTHER EITHER!! OUR WORLD IS A DANGEROUS PLACE FOR CHILDREN - AND GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY!!"

OMG I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!

A HUMAN BEING CHEWING THE FACE OF A FELLOW HUMAN BEING WHILE HE IS STILL ALIVE!

THIS IS SICKENING!

YET PEOPLE STILL COME OUT TO SAY HE IS A GOOD PERSON!

OMG!!!!!!!!!

I’M STILL IN SHOCK!!!!!!!!

BETTER TO FIND MYSELF IN THE LION’S DEN THAN TO FALL INTO THESE PEOPLE’S HANDS!

“HOW COULD A HUMAN BEING DO THAT TO ANOTHER FELLOW HUMAN BEING??”

“IF HE WANTS TO BE AN ANIMAL TREAT HIM AS SUCH, I BELIEVE DOGS THAT DO THIS GET THE LETHAL INJECTION...”

“WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH THIS PLANET?? BLOODY ANIMALS - MAKES ME SICK!!”

“THIS IS THE RESULT OF PEOPLE CONSIDERING SUICIDE AND OVERDOSING ON ALL KINDS OF STUPID FATAL DRUGS THAT THEY END UP GETTING HOLD OF!!!!!!!!!! GOD HELP US ALL - BECAUSE THE LAW WON'T!!!!!!!!!!”

I'M GLAD I HAVEN'T GOT ANY CHILDREN AND I DON'T THINK ANYONE ELSE SHOULD BOTHER HAVING ANY EITHER - THIS WORLD IS NO LONGER A SAFE PLACE TO BRING UP ANY CHILDREN IN!!!!!!!!

CHILDREN ARE NOT WORTH HAVING ANYWAY - ESPECIALLY BECAUSE OF WHAT THEY'RE TURNING INTO AND BECAUSE OF HOW MUCH THEY'VE DESTROYED THE WHOLE OF SOCIETY!!!!!!!!!

THE WORLD HAS BECOME A DISGUSTING PLACE I DON'T EVEN WANT TO LIVE IN IT ANYMORE LET ALONE BRING ANY CHILDREN INTO IT!!

THE WORLD IS NOT A SAFE PLACE FOR ANYONE LET ALONE CHILDREN!!!!!!!! OUR WORLD IS A DANGEROUS PLACE TO LIVE IN - AND GETTING WORSE BY THE DAY!!

“WOW, WHAT A SAD STATE THE HUMAN RACE HAS COME TO. MAY THE LORD GOD HAVE MERCY ON US

ALL.”

“ DO SOMETHING TO MAKE IT BETTER THEN!!!!”

I'VE BEEN SAYING FOR A LONG FUCKING TIME THE WORLD HAS GONE MAD!! THERE IS NO HOPE FOR HUMANITY ANYMORE!!!!!!!!

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